There is a reason all those cars are trying to escape, man!

I like a lot of the work that cable television channels are doing now with original programming.  I guess with over 200, 500, however many digital channels you can get nowadays, they have to compete somehow.  I watch SyFy and USA, and recently AMC.  Who would have thought that the channel that just used to air old movies, would have so much potential?  I have watched the first couple of season of Mad Men, and been intrigued (even though sometimes it moves a little slowly)  I have watched the first season of Breaking Bad and been amazed (Bryan Cranston is an Spectacular in this role!  Who knew he had it in him, after only seeing Malcolm in the Middle?)  So, I heard all this hype about the new AMC series, The Walking Dead, and even though I am not a big zombie fan, I decided to give the first episode a shot when I found it on hulu.

First off I was hit by the camera angles.  Wide expanses of scenery, of cars overturned and tents left abandoned, and one man, a sheriff, walks through it all….alone.  You know what kind of show it is going in.  The anticipation, the waiting, the watching every possible hiding place for that first lurching limp is used to maximum effect here.  It is almost like they are teasing you.  (Wait for it….wait for it…oop, you missed it…oop not quite yet, but soon!)

  I think that is what this show does best, at least in the pilot.  It build the anticipation, slowly, so don’t even notice it is happening.  There are places where there is no soundtrack.  This may sound like no big deal, but it gets so quiet, its surreal.  It hightens every sound that is heard, and reminds you that this character walks in a world alone. 

Like all the AMC shows I’ve watched, they make sure to develop the main character and those he interacts with.  The sherriff has a rocky marriage, before he loses the world he knows, to wake up to nightmare version he doesn’t  In this new world, he can’t fins his wife and child and he meets characters haunted by their own pasts, much of which have to do with the onset of the plague which turned the world upside down.

  That being said, the first episode dragged a little for me.  It takes so long for the zombies to be a real threat (for a long time, they are more of an implied threat, wandering around, ready to attack, but not yet having smelt blood), that I got a little bored.  However, I suspect that much of that is just the exposition.  In the last ten minutes, the sheriff enters a new town, with the vieled warning “…he doesnt know what he’s walking into…” and the subsequent scene finally unleashed some of the horror of the zombies that I had been waiting for, as well as a little more humor.  The last line made me want to tune-in for the next episode to see what happens next.  I’m not sure how true it is to the original graphic novel, which I haven’t read, but I trust that they are trying to do it right, and I know it will only get better from here.  If nothing else, the ever increasing number of the living ought to provide endless oppurtunity for growth.

Honrable Mention: Fraggle Rock, Rainbow Bright, Care Bears, Muppet Babies and(even though it started in the 70s, as it was a big part of my growing up in the 80s), Scooby Doo

7. My Little Ponys

I am embarrased to admit I watched this series, but the movie where they have to use the flutter ponies to fight of the slime is still scary accurate in my mind.  Besides, what young girl doesn’t want a pony growing up?

6. Duck Tales

Maybe this show is a little obscure, but I used to watch a lot of the Disney Channel.  Scrooge McDuck, swimming through his vault of gold coins, defying all logic of mass, is one of those images that stays with me.  And then of course you have his three trouble some nephews , Huey, Dewy and Louie (the same number of a certain group of mischevious chipmunks…huh), and the crazy flying ace, and the rest of the misfit cast, including an Elvira like female villian who is always trying to steal Scrooge’s money.

5.Chip and Dale Rescue Rangers

So of course you have Chip and Dale, but the character I remember most is Gadget.  It was fun to see all the ways she found to make tiny household objects into great inventions, much like a female, rodent sized Macgyver.  And of course, there was that little bit of mystery and crime caper in this show.  The show saw often motivated by the odd couple nature of Chip being straight laced, and getting things done and Dale being the more zany, uncontrollable character.

4. Inspector Gadget

I loved this show growing up.  I liked that the inspector was so completely clueless and that Penny and her dog had to solve all the crimes and catch the bad guys, and still make it look like Inspector Gadget had accomplished it.  Sort of a kids version of the Pink Panther, or Get Smart. I remember watching the live action movie with Mathew Broderick and being hugely disappointed with it. Mostly I was upset because the had ignored the maxim that you never get to see The Claw.  The best part of the Claw is that you never see more than his hand petting his cat.

3. Smurfs

I dont think any nostalgic 80s cartoon list could be complete without the Smurfs.  They are iconic and a fruedian dream.  So many thoughts on why Gargamel wanted to eat them (dark for a kids show, right?), why they are blue and live in mushrooms, Hw many times can they smurf in one sentence and how many different meanings can this one word have, and finally, what it means that they start off with no girls, till the villian introduces just one into their community (until unexplicably, without her pairing up, there are three children smurfs, one of which is the second girl)

2 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Aww, reptilian ninjas taught by a rat, saving New York while scarfing pizza.  I don’t know, it was iconic.  I loved it , and the first live action movie that it spawned.  Maybe it was just that it was so random.  Of course, there was martial arts and crazy 80s slang in every episode, so I am sure that didn’t hurt.

1 He-Man / She-Ra

Is it just me, or does he get A Lot more sun than she does?

Definitely my favorite, most remembered television series from the 80s.  I had She-Ra’s castle, my sister had Castle Greyskull and we all had action figures that we used to play with.  My parents stored new action figures in the garage to hide them till they finally gave them to us.  The He-Man / She-Ra movie was the only movie my younger sisters and I could agree on at the rental store.  I’m Not sure why we never just bought the movie….

Like many of these 80s shows, it was a series based on selling action figures, and in my case it obviously worked.  However, it did have actual plotlines, past just beating up new bad guys every week, and, having just re-watched a few episodes recently, I have to say, the writing was terribly in some ways, but poignantly so.  There was this one line: “…he grew lonely and evil.”  It is almost like watching MS3TK, but not even needing the robots.  I know this is not how I felt when I originally watched it; back then I was fascinated, but I think this show still has something.   “By the Power of Greyskull!”

I want to talk about of a few of my favorites from the summer season, and how the seasons went when compared to the last season.  In the case of one, how its rebirth stacked up when compared to the seasons it followed.  The following order is basically how my week of television watching went.

First, I will look at Futurama. Futurama came back on the air after a seven year cancellation–*ahem* hiatus.  The show came back with a literal rebirth with (most of) the Planet Express crew dying and being reborn.  From that episode, the show just got stronger as the newest season forged on.  That is, with a couple of…meh episodes in between.  I am looking at you, That Darn Katz!  The season wrapped up very well, with a change in the outlook of the future of New New York’s mutant population.  All-in-all this season’s offerings help up very well when compared with past episodes.

Eureka returned for it’s half-season (don’t get me started on SyFy and it’s mid-season finale BS), and began things anew, for the most part.  Forced time-travel due to some equipment malfunction–and what equipment doesn’t malfunction in Eureka, I dare ask–takes a few of the cast members back to before the town’s founding in the 1940s.  Eureka handled itself quite well this season, even adding in a new character to a cast that already has so many to care about.  It was pretty much on par with past seasons (or half seasons or whatever have you).

One of my favorite shows on TV today, Doctor Who, began with a new Doctor at the helm of the TARDIS.  After having seen all of the episodes of the ninth and tenth incarnations of the Doctor, I was excited for another change to the shows lineup.  Matt Smith’s Doctor is much younger than the others before him, and I think I find him easier to relate to (yes, I know he is a 900 plus year-old alien).  His new companion, Amy Pond is completely lovable.  The stories this season have been quite well done, and many of them have been poignant–I shed many a tear watching Vincent and the Doctor.  I certainly cannot wait to see what the Doctor is up to next!

True Blood always culminated my TV watching for the week during the summer.  I mentioned all of these shows in my recent Top 7 article, and with good reason: they are great shows.  I enjoyed this season of True Blood so much!  Though there were some pretty annoying plot elements, like Sam Merlotte’s family showing up, and Tara’s constant crying, this was a top-notch run.  When compared with the campiness that exuded from last season’s maenad plot line, season three was shone like the sun.  As it wraps up this week, I am kind of bummed.  Sunday night’s always included a get together with friends, so we could watch.

While I cannot wait for these shows to air again, there are some great shows coming in the fall line up.  Old favorites of mine like Fringe are set to return soon which excites me to no end.  Weeds has already made it’s return, and I was sucked into The Big C so quickly that it is an unexpected new favorite.  Some other great contenders are coming out of the pay channels as well, like Boardwalk Empire.  This fall looks like it’s going to have a full viewing schedule.

Cheesy, but for some reason it I loved it.

I decided on something easy to get me started, but feel free to email any of us with any ideas you would like to see us cover.

SciFi television is something I have always loved, even when sometimes it is not up to par.  I have mentioned before that I used to watch SciFi with my family, but most especially with my dad.  It is one of the ways we bonded.  Maybe that is why I still have such a deep love of it today.  While compiling this list, I realized that it is really hard to rank your favorite shows, and in someways, those that I had seen more recently kept creeping up the list.  Mostly this convinced me that I need to rewatch all my old favorites to do this right.  However, as I still have to work and re-watching all that  tv is unpaid, I am going to do the best I can on my recollections alone.

Honorable mentions: Dead Like Me, Witchblade (TNT Series), Pushing Daisies, Firefly, Dollhouse, Quantum Leap, The Guild

7.  3rd Rock from the Sun

Seventh place was somehow the hardest to pick.  I ended up going with 3rd Rock, mostly, because it was a sitcom, while all the rest were hour long dramas (more or less).  3rd Rock had that little bit of SciFi, but was still on network television, attracted a large audience, and was truly funny.  Maybe it didn’t have quite the mystery, costuming and otherness of most of my  other choices, but it worked and had a scifi background.

6. Dr Who (new version)

David Tennant is so expressive! My favorite Dr.

 To be fair, I have never watched the original Dr Who, which i hear is great and has the same quality as Bond, where you get to replace the Dr. and his companion regularly within the framework of the show and without upsetting the fan base.  I admit that many of the monsters/aliens / special effects are a little cheesy in this series at times, but I think the acting is part of what really makes me love this series.  David Tennant is just so expressive.  His Dr is like a little kid in his enthusiasm for life, and yet he can still be serious when that gift is threatened.  Great chemistry and often great writing (Turn Left, and the angel episode) make this series worth watching.

5. Star Trek: The Next Generation

My first introduction to SciFi

This was my first foray into Scifi, and I watched it with my dad.  My best friend at the time also watched it.  Together we would buy the action figures and read the spin-off books (I mostly remember Imzadi)  In high school, we went to see the first Next Generation movie together in the theatres. I even came to my love of tea through watching Jean-Luc Piccard constantly ordering Earl Grey. I don’t know if it is all nostalgia, but I love this show.

4. Babylon 5

I remember when they tried to cancel this show before its 5 seasons were finished.  I was so upset, and then they had to rewrite season 5 because the actress for Ivonova walked off in contract negotiations.  This show first introduced me to the annoyances that come with loving scifi, or really any television programming.  It can be canceled at the whim of the network, consigning so many unanswered questions, realtionships and mysteries to the trash heap.  Fortunately it did make it to season 5, and there were really so many long storylines that they got a chance to play out, which I loved;  The reltionships between G’kar and Lando, even Lando and Vir, the growth many characters had to go through.  There was a lot of Star Trek plotlines in this series (individual questions of clashing cultures and morality) but the overreaching plotline made it stand out to me, and because it was plotted from the beginning, it didn’t dissolve into complete soap opera, which I always appreciate.

3. Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Oh and right after my soap opera comment, I dive into the drama that is a high school vampire slayer.  This was my first official introduction to Joss Whedon.   My sisters got me into it in high school, and I have to say I was not impressed with the plotline of the first episode I watched.  It seemed a little corny and a little forced, but the dialogue was awesome.  So I tuned in for more dialogue and got addicted to the character insight and sheer plot genius that is Joss Whedon.  I now watch pretty much anything with his name on it, and I know I am not alone.  I was a little disappointed when it went to the UPN network, and Joss was no longer with it full time, as he was also juggling Angel at that time, but I felt the season 4 closer would have been a perfect end to the series.  Of course, then I would never have gotten to experience Buffy: the Musical, and that would have been a real shame.

2. Farscape

Farscape…what can I say?  Muppets, and new “f” swear word (frell), fantastic creatures, great plotlines, great villians, a cast that changes to keep the show feeling new, episodes done as roadrunner cartoons?  I guess it is in part this show’s willingness to takes risks that makes me love it.  I love the cast of characters and the vibrancy that comes from painting half of your aliens different colors.  I know I sound glib, but I do own this entire series on dvd.

1. Battlestar Galactica (new version)

Best show…I introduced non-scifi fans to it, and after their intial uneasiness at watching scifi, they too became addicts.  It is so much more about people and politics, then it is about scifi and it reflects so poignantly on our real world and all the crisis we face in it.  I was devastated to hear it was canceled, and yet, it that way it could never just die out, as so many other shows do in long runs.  I loved Starbuck, for I felt I could never quite peg her down, though I also felt I knew her so well.  I liked the Dr for the sheer fact that he was a coward and a narcisst and yet sometimes was still plagued with conscience.  I loved seeing how positions of power or lack there of changed these people and the questions posed when the final 5 were revealed.  There is so much to catch in subsequent viewings and so much to think about even the first time through.  I just can’t express how much I love this show.

Yes, as the natural world winds down to the deep sleep of winter, we humans ramp up plently of nerd friendly entertainments.  First, I am really excited for the Spiderman musical.  This is not to say I think it will be great, or possible even good, but roaring success, or catastrophic failure, I will be there to review it myself.  Apart from the seeming impossibility of putting almost any superhero on stage (yes, Toxic Avenger already got an off-broadway musical), Bono and U2 are doing the music.  And when I first moved to New York, Alan Cumming was going to play the Green Goblin.  Tragically, He has since left the show for other obligations, and considering it was supposed to start in Feburaury and is currently selling tickets for opening in November….who can blame him?  Since it looks like this is finally cast and snag-free, I look forward to trying to find an inexpensive, good seat…..hmmm, I may have to work a little harder on that.

Next, New York Comic Con is on its way in October.  I am going to try and go on my day off.  James Marsters and Kate Sarkoff, among many others will be present.  I keep checking for an updated event list, but that it must stil be under development, as I can’t find one.  I am sure many other great names will be there, but I should state here, that while I enjoy comic books I read mostly The Uncanny X-men in high school, and am sadly uninformed on most other comics and their related star writers and illustrators. 

Also, new television season brings with it the hope of another first season of Heroes….There is ABC’s offering of No Ordinary Family..Basically, family goes on vacation…freak accident…Fantastic Four…oh wait, copyright infringement…The Incredibles….Well anyways, family with superpowers, and everyday problems tries to continue living an ordinary life when they are anything but. 

NBC  has The Cape, about a cop and father who becomes his son’s favorite superhero, to fight the corruption he finds in his workplace and the city at large.

For you Zombie lovers out there, AMC is premiering a series called the Walking Dead.  Yes, an entire series about Zombies.  I wonder how they will create meaningful storyline or at least varying action sequences, but this network has held its own with Mad Men and Breaking Bad, so I will give them the benefit of the doubt.  And it is based on a popular comic, which gives AMC something to work from.

Stephen Speilberg’s Terrnova may have potential, but as a midseason replacement, with little info, it is hard to tell. The synopsis has to do with humans trying to go back in time to reverse the damage we did to the planet, which made it unlivable.

I know there are many more new shows  out there.  For example, I really look forward to Running Wilde, the new comedy starring Will Arnett from Arrested Development.  It may be too quirky to last long, but if it is anything like Arrested Development, I will enjoy the ride as long as it lasts. 

 Enjoy the fall and all it has to offer, and let me know what if I have left out anything of interest, for I would hate to miss something out of ignorance of its existence.

Anyways, I have seen ads all over the city which reminded me that the new off-season television season is upon us, and cable networks have all started broadcasting their original programming.  As I have limited time to watch television shows, I am currently watching only a few shows, including Wherehouse 13.

I am willing to give most shows on the SyFy channel a shot.  Sometimes this works out beautifully, as it did with Battlestar Galactica or Farscape.  Other times, I don’t make it through a single episode, as most memorably, part of an episode of The Black Scorpion, which I watched with my dad.  (No wonder that one didn’t last.)

Most of their more recent offerings have been well thought out, well scripted, and if they are not too original or touching, they are at least watchable and enjoyable.  I like Eureka….I like Wherehouse 13, but I am not devestated if I miss an episode, and I am not burning to see the nest episode.  It is merely an ejoyable 45 minutes for eating, or folding laundry.

Then there are the disasters.  Those shows which don’t make it past maybe even three episodes.  The ones which make you wonder how they made it out of the boardroom and got a pilot.  Included in these shows is the Black Scorpion, among others.  Weak plot, bad, predicatable action, stilted dialogue, and awful costumes.

Yes, it is as bad as it looks. Can you believe it made 22 episodes?

I also have to include many of their original movies in the bad catagory.  They may get some B-list stars, but unless they are going for campy with someone like Bruce Campbell, I think that their original movie section largely falls short of the mark for good programming.  Just watching the trailers makes me avoid the movie, and I am pretty sure they are supposed to have the opposite effect.  Of course, they are mostly creature features, and if that is what you are there for, they deliver.

Lastly, there are those show which make it great.  How can you explain to someone the depth of character development that went into Battlestar Galactica?  It truly explores human emotion, and human rationalizations.  It takes the fantastic and makes it seem real, while also presenting a social commentary on the state of the world today.  This program took risks, did the unexpected, and ended before it lost its touch (though I mourned its end none- the- less).  If you are one of the few who hasn’t seen it, I encourage you to rent it and give it a try.  It is free at your local library!  

Yay, Muppet Love!

 I admit Farscape was not nearly as deep, but it was fun, it was surprising and it again had the character development that I look for in any show I watch. Plus it had muppets!  How can anyone not love the use of muppets?

I also enjoy many of the SyFy mini-series. They, too, can be hit and miss, but when they get it right, it is multiple days of fun.  Some of my favorites are The Lost Room, Tin Man, and Dune. SyFy also provides a home for imports from other channels, like Stargate and Dr Who.  Can I say how sad I am to see David Tennant leave?  Best Doctor Ever! 

You will be missed!

So I love the SyFy channel for producing the shows I love, and I hate them for all the terrible hash-ups with poor production quality and worse scripting which ruin their reputation and waste my time.  I guess it is the same drama that any television channel must suffer through, but I mean really! 

Did you hear why they changed the spelling on thier name?  To try and sound less geeky and appeal to a wider audience.  To be fair, they say it is because it is easier to trademark the name/brand, and that people had confusion with which letters to capitalize  in SciFi (WTF?)  I don’t buy it.  I’m sorry, no matter how you spell it, we all know it stands for science fiction.   The current audience tunes in  for the Science fiction programming, so keep it comming! No more of this pro wrestling, or bad movies, or ill-concieved series that no one expected to last when they dreamt it up.  Battlestar Galactica worked because it was smart scifi and look how it increased viewership. 

I mean, the United Nations held a conference featuring Battlestar Galactica insiders talking about terrorism, armed conflict, and  human rights.   How many networks can boast that?  A few more shows like Battlestar, and their reputation will grow by word of mouth, beyond the usual suspects (nerds/geeks).  Meanwhile, I will watch whatever I can, however I can, in hopes of finding that next great phenomenom, even if I have to suffer through the riff-raff to get there.

I toyed with the idea of writing this on the night that Futurama began airing again.  I sort of forgot about it until this week, when Rufus commented on a Facebook post I had made using a quote from the most recent episode.  It was then that I decided to write a short piece on the return of Futurama to television.  It’s not super in-depth, because I don’t want to spoil any of the episodes.  I am probably naive in thinking that some of you might not have seen the debut episodes, but that’s neither here, not there.

Last Thursday a momentous event occurred.  No, I am not talking about my first official post on the site…I am talking about the debut of all new episodes of Futurama on Comedy Central.  I don’t know about anyone else out there, but when Fox canceled the show back in 2003, I felt wronged.

In between the last episode of the series when it was on Fox, and the newest episodes that have recently started airing, there have been four DVD releases.  Each of these DVDs played out like extra long episodes of the series, and worked as trial episodes.

A decision was made to begin new episodes, airing on television.  After seven long years Futurama finally made a triumphant return.  Comedy Central had one of its biggest nights, viewer wise, because of the show’s return.

Picking up right where the fourth DVD (Into the Wild Green Yonder) left off.  The Planet Express ship, containing the entire main cast of the show, arrives at Earth after going through the Panama wormhole.  Most of the cast, however, meets its fiery doom as the ship (and Nimbus, Zapp Brannigan’s ship) crash just outside the Planet Express building in New New York.

The debut episode was entitled “Rebirth”, and was quite fitting since each of the crew (minus the Professor) had to go through an actual rebirth via stem cells.  The story of the episode had some interesting twists, reminiscent of “The Sting”, but not quite as involved.  All-in-all it was a great debut.  It was almost as if the show was on hiatus—and extremely long hiatus—rather than canceled.

The second episode (two aired for the debut), “Inna-Gadda-Da-Leela”, was a classic Zapp-focused episode.  Zapp and Leela undertake a mission to stop a “death ball” from censoring the Earth, and crash land on a veritable Eden world.  It also contained many of the fun elements that most Futurama episodes are known for, like the futuristic take on older cinema newsreels.

The most current episode, “Attack of the Killer App” was (at least to me) an instant classic.  A lampoon of many current trends—Twitter and the iPhone and Susan Boyle, namely—it speared these issues as only a series set a thousand years into the future can!  It was full of some great jokes, and still managed a hint of sweetness, when dealing with some Fry and Leela issues.

I am thrilled that Futurama is back on the air.  Though some of the DVD releases were weak—I am looking at you, Bender’s Big Score!!—the new episodes of the series have been very good, so far.  Some are saying that the humor has gotten crude, but I think those crude jokes were always in there.  I don’t know.  I just hope that the writers keep up the good work.  I don’t want to see another cancelation!

Yes, they cancelled you too. Back to the big screen, Harold.

Wow, before I say anything else, let me say some of the Lost hate I’ve been glancing over everywhere (including on our site) is surprising. At this point I have to ask: did anyone actually believe all the plot would be tied up nicely and succinctly in the final season? I didn’t, but for what it’s worth they finished up with an ending that  - while not being terribly exciting – worked. I got (most) of my major questions answered, and saw some cast members pop in and take a final bow. I wasn’t even annoyed to see Shannon and Boone, who were pretty must useless besides bringing  in that uncomfortable hint of incest to Season 1. Like someone said on Scott’s message board, the show was mainly about the connection of the lives of all the characters involved, and they stuck to it right to the very end of a great show. The ending wasn’t out of this world, but who cares? It was good, and in fact, when was the last time a hit show lasting over 5 years had a fantastic conclusion? Yeah.

Ok with that said, let me get on to what is really annoying me today: Fuck the ABC network. Man, I feel better already. I don’t want to complain about ABC’s related networks and companies (Disney, ESPN, etc.), but mainly about their mind-blowingly impeccable plan to run their network into the ground with horrible programming. While I could argue that lately television in general has been suffering, but I could say that this channel right now is synonymous with impatience and bad decisions. Besides Greys Anatomy and Dancing With the Stars (neither of which I watch), all they have on TV is crap. The list of bad shows piling up is starting to look like the car pileup in the pilot of Flash Forward… speaking of, that too has been cancelled, and it was the only show I saw any potential in.

Through all of this, somehow V got renewed for a second season, a move that boggles me because really that show was pretty awful. I didn’t make it through three episodes of a remake of a show I loved as a kid, and that’s coming from a man who watched every last episode of NBC’s Knight Rider remake. Yeah, no shame.

Any saving graces here? Modern Family, which is getting some critical acclaim, seems to be the only thing worth watching on the network now, and No Ordinary Family, a show ABC officially picked up this month that sounds like a live-action version of The Incredibles seems interesting. Starring Julie Benz and Michael Chiklis, I still have no idea where this story is going to go but here’s the trailer:

What am I not looking forward to? Well, we could take this summer’s The Gates, a new show starring Rhona Mitra (aka Kate Beckinsale with a body) that ABC claims to be is “Desperate Housewives meets Buffy the Vampire Slayer“. I don’t know who told them anyone was waiting for that combination to come along:

Other than that, I fear my time with ABC is coming to an end. The way things are going right now, I can’t say I’ll miss it.

I wasted so many hours of my life on this...

Dear LOST writers’ room: What the fuck happened?  Why did you feel it was necessary to only answer a couple of the questions brought up in Season 1?  Why would you have an alternate timeline if it doesn’t (in any legitimate fucking way) tie into the main storyline?  What’s with this afterlife bullshit?  So the island wasn’t an afterlife (which would have at least made a little sense) but the alternate timeline was?  Then WHAT WAS THE FUCKING ISLAND?  The Jacob storyline was wicked cool, but it didn’t explain anything…and why did you rip off Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

Dead Splinter Addresses Turtles via campfire

Dead Jacob Addresses Candidates via Campfire

What’s with all of the melodramatic violin solos and flashback moments?  I thought LOST had more class than that.  What’s with the Jack vs John Locke on a cliff?  Why did you feel the need to rip off the Lion King?

Jack vs Locke; very original

And why couldn’t they let Locke leave the island?  Was there any point in stopping him?  According to the story, he was just a guy who had been trying to leave the island for a very long time.  He might have been brutal, but Jacob was the asshole who was blindly following C.J. from the West Wing.  According to Ricardo’s dead wife, if Locke leaves the island, “we all go to hell.”  Let’s explore that a little more.  Oh wait, we can’t.  Desmond uncorked some Deus ex machina style bullshit that showed up in episode 15 of the last season, and somehow (it won’t ever make sense) Locke became vulnerable to Jack’s wimpy pugilism.  Yeah, it sucks.  The light at the center of the island is a last minute cop-out, and it made me want to slap someone.

Oh, and P.S. – Ben Linus was your strongest character, and you turned him into a limp meat sack for the entirety of Season 6.  Well done on systematically avoiding any and all interesting possibilities.  You created a LOST reunion episode and you ruined my favorite series.  Thanks.

And without further ado..

What I think happened:

• The Island is real I firmly believe what happened on the Island was real life–they were still alive and well. It would be silly to assume that there are two afterlives, and everything they talk about in the sideways flashes (after they know about their pasts) pertains to the Island and what happened there (such as Hurley and Ben referencing their time on the Island together).
• The Sideways Reality The people on the Island were reluctant to let go. It was one of the themes throughout the show, and the sideways reality was the passengers of flight 815 not being able to accept their death and let go of their life, the one they missed out on while they were on the Island. Yes, it was quite a bit different than what their lives were like upon leaving Sydney, but with the relationships they built on the Island the vision of their lives would have been affected by the people that were so important to them on the Island. The ability for the passengers of flight 815 were able to finally let go and accept their deaths when they were reunited with the people that had meant so much to them in life.
• the Island What is the Island? I don’t think anyone knows. I don’t think even Jacob or Smokeman (Locke) really knew. I think the Dharma Initiative was trying to find out, as was Widmore. For this reason, I think that everything wasn’t explained. I almost would have been disappointed if all my questions were answered, though. Lost has never been good at telling you what it was, it lives up to its name.

What surprised me most:

• How much I didn’t want Jack to die This sounds awful, but when I went into the series finale I kept saying to myself, “I just want Desmond to live.” After Jin and Sun’s death, I knew anyone could die and I accepted that. What I didn’t want to accept was Desmond’s death. However, when it came down to it, Jack’s death upset me more than I thought it would. More recently (within the past season or two) he had been kind of annoying me, but I’m still really fond of him.
• Hurley and Ben, number 1 and 2 The fact that Hurley became the protector of the Island didn’t really surprise me–it was the fact that he asked Ben to be his Richard. And when he asked, Ben was genuinely touched, which I thought that was really, really great. Somehow, their relationship was a great addition and unexpected. Their exchange in front of the church made it even more special. Even after all the awful things he’s done, Ben isn’t the bad guy, leave it to Hurley to understand that.

Things I wish had some resolution:

• Women not having children
• What happened to Desmond     I just want confirmation he’s ok.. I realize that Ben told Hurley that there were other ways to get off the Island, and that maybe it didn’t have to be how Jacob ran things
• What happened to Michael and Walt     Anyone else notice they were missing from the sideways reality?

What I want to see more of:

• Sun and Jin’s super cute girl
• Miles and Sawyer as partners!     They act like a married couple, I swear.

Overall, what I couldn’t stop thinking about this final episode was how much I LOVED these characters. Every one of them played a special part, every one of them had their vices and virtues. When they “remembered” what had happened to them on the Island (most particularly with Sawyer/Juliet, Jin/Sun, and Charlie/Claire), it was amazing to realize how much these people had gone through together. That’s why I’m glad this was more emotionally satisfying than intellectually satisfying–I think it needed to be that way.